If Only In My Dreams
by akina kumitami
Summary: Yuugi's guardian angel comes to help him cope with the events of Egypt that occurred one month ago. Sometimes those who wear the strongest masks are the ones feeling the weakest. Postseries. Implied puzzleshipping, sort of...a littleish. Oneshot.


A/N: Okay, so before you all kill me, I bring you a story. Not a chapter of a story that needs updating, but a oneshot that was sitting around having plot bunny babies in my head one day while midterms were approaching. And yes, I am pulling the midterm excuse. YOU try being an engineering student.

Anyway, without further ado, I bring you a cute oneshot ficlet whose inspiration came from a few places, a few beliefs, and one very lovely pairing.

Disclaimer: I, Akina, do not own any part of the Yu-Gi-Oh series or any of its merchandise. Except this Yami pillow. And this plot bunny.

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"_We all have a social mask, right? We put it on, we go out, put our best foot forward, our best image. But behind that social mask is a personal truth, what we really, really believe about who we are and what we're capable of.__ "  
--__Phil McGraw_

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"…_Aibou_…"

Yuugi moaned. Couldn't his brain let him get some rest?

Every time. He it every night. That voice. But when he opened his eyes, just the tiniest bit hopeful, the room was as empty and dark as it had been when he laid down to try and sleep (try being the key word).

He was pining for something he'd never get back, and it was beginning to cause hallucinations. This couldn't be healthy.

"_Aibou_."

He cracked an eye open. Something was…this hallucination was different.

He sat up in the bed. A bed that was different than the one he tried to fall asleep in. It was both comfortable, and yet totally awkward at the same time.

What was this place? It was similar to his soul room, from what he could remember about it, except the lighting was dim and there weren't many things inside. The floor was actually tidy, not littered with toys like it used to be. The door still stood across from the bed, but it was closed tightly. It was sort of…dingy? Dreary. Like it was warm, but not inviting.

The door thumped. Yuugi yelped.

"Aibou? Are you there? Come open the door."

"Wha-what? Who is it?"

"Aibou! You _are_ there! Now honestly, how many other people refer to you by 'Aibou'? Come let me in."

Yuugi stood. His knees were shaking. It wasn't exactly cold. Maybe fear? This had to be a dream.

The distance between him and the door closed. He reached an unsteady hand out, but paused. Why on Earth was he so afraid of what could be waiting on the other side? If this was a dream, it couldn't hurt him, right?

Right?

He scoffed at the thought. He had enough experience with the Shadow Realm to know that dreams very well _could_ hurt you, or for that matter, kill you. And they often weren't even dreams. Just the most real illusion (for lack of a better word, unless one preferred Shadowy Magical Beasty Hellhole) you'll ever be stuck in. And his many explorations through the puzzle taught him to never open random doors.

The puzzle…he retracted his hand, hovering it where the large golden pyramid used to sit against his chest. His fingers ached to touch it. But then, that was impossible. It was gone. It disappeared the same day that…

"Aibou, _please_, I assure you it is me. I do not have much time. Open the door and I can explain."

Yuugi gulped. His hand went back to the door knob. It was stuck, but with a couple jiggles and a good punch of the shoulder (Yuugi made a mental note of the aching in his shoulder), the door swung open.

Amethyst eyes met their match, touched with warm crimson. Yuugi gaped like a waterless fish. He was certainly breathing like one.

This _definitely _had to be a dream.

"M…m-mou…hitori…boku…"

The eyes lit up. The face smiled. What a dazzling smile. He last saw that smile a month ago, in a temple in Egypt…except then it was sad and accepting and encouraging. Now it was like it used to be before…

"Aibou, I'm so glad you—_oof!_"

Atemu was practically bowled over by his near-twin as two arms wrapped around him tightly. The little figure was shaking. And his shirt was getting wet where his aibou's face was buried. And then there were some mumbles accompanied by sobs and the occasional hiccup.

"Y-you're here…a-and I c-can hu-hu-hug you…and if th…if this is dr-dream…I'm go-ing to…die and…"

Atemu returned the hug, rubbing his aibou's back slowly and soothingly as he began working his way into the room and starting to close the door softly behind him. Hopefully it wouldn't lock them in. The way Yuugi was acting, it very well could.

Atemu left the door ajar.

"Shh, shh Aibou. I know. It is quite complicated. You need to calm down. I have not held you in so long, but you are so much better company when you're smiling."

He was punched in the chest. It actually hurt. When did he get strength like that?

"Don't start joking with me! What the hell is going on? You had better be real, Mou Hitori no Boku, or if your just a dream I'll...I'll…well I'll never go to sleep again!"

"Aibou, that is hardly realistic—"

"Why are you haunting me?"

"Calm down, Aibou! I'm not! I want to explain this to you!"

Yuugi folded his arms, glaring at the figure. He looked exactly as he did in the Memory World, in full Pharaoh regalia. It made sense, since that was who he really was and how he should have died. He stood exactly as he did, his back straight and chin held just high enough to demand authority without needing to demand anything. His eyes weren't stern though. They weren't his pharaoh eyes. These were the eyes that few rarely ever saw, when he was being a human who didn't have to save the world today and could just talk to you. These eyes held all the emotions he tried so hard to hide behind his pharaoh persona.

Atemu shifted, glancing around the room. "You know, in Egypt we held dreams in very high regard. We saw them as signs from the gods, or as messages from loved ones who had passed on." He looked Yuugi full on then. It was Yuugi's turn to shift.

"So you're telling me this _is_ a dream?"

"Well…sort of. You see, dreams are the only way that the…" he was about to say "dead," but stopped, trying to chose his words carefully so as not to upset the obviously shaken boy, "that spirits can interact with the living. But _your_ dreams often lead you to your soul room, especially when your mind is particularly restless, if you recall. And you haven't been getting much sleep lately. Coaxing your mind back to your soul room was a bit harder than I thought it would be."

"Yeah, I know I haven't been getting much sleep! You've been haunting me!" Yuugi shouted with distress.

"It must be great to be dead! You don't have to feel that…that…" He grabbed a fistful of his hair and pressed his wrist hard into his forehead. "You don't get that emptiness that's left after the spirit you shared a body with for two years is suddenly gone!"

Yuugi looked back up at Atemu. The eyes were hurt now. Good. He _should_ be feeling bad for leaving his other self this way and having a grand old time in heaven.

Jerk. Pharaohs think they run everything…

"Aibou, I…I know it's been hard for you. But I'm not really gone, you know that, right? I've been watching you. I can do that, in the after life. We can watch over those we care about. And be near them." Atemu moved closer to Yuugi, slowly, as if approaching a skittery rabbit. "And when you dream, when you fall asleep, I can actually talk to you. Not for long though. I have time limits, and the human mind is only in this deep state of consciousness for so long. But it's like before. Here I can," he was close enough to reach out a hand and lay it on the younger boy's shoulder, "touch you, speak to you, and actually be with you rather than by you."

Atemu corrected himself. The boy wasn't younger. He was as old as himself now. His time in that body ended when it reached the same age as he was when he died originally. Yuugi had finally won the right to be his own person. And though he might not admit it, his aibou looked different.

He stood tall; a king in his own right. His face was tired, worn from school and helping in the Kame Game Shop, lack of sleep (Atemu felt a little guilty) and the grieving he had done (Atemu felt a little more guilty). But even when feeling defeated, the boy still remained upbeat and helpful around others, letting the kindness in his big heart shine.

Only when he was alone did the sadness take over, and he was left to feel the empty spot in his heart where the old spirit once resided. He became better at hiding behind a mask of strength. And he wouldn't cry, but let it sink in that he really was alone with himself now. Only now, in the presence of Atemu, did the boy show his emotions openly.

Damn, they really were so much alike. Being born of the same soul can do that to you.

"How can I be sure…" Yuugi was speaking softly, avoiding the eye of the Egyptian with his hand on his shoulder. "How can I be sure this isn't just a dream, and that you aren't really here at all?"

Atemu smiled, and taking the pale hand in his own tan one, he squeezed it around an object. "Take this, Aibou. You'll know, little one. Know I'll always be here." Atemu leaned down further, trying to catch Yuugi's eye. "When you are at school, I'll be guarding you. When you are dueling, I'll be supporting you. When you are lost, I'll be guiding you. When you are asleep, I'll be comforting you. And when you are so restless or so relaxed that your mind leads you here again, I'll be waiting at the door for you. And when you join me in heaven, I'll take your hand and lead you through the gate."

Yuugi looked at him fully. He was crying again. Atemu wrapped his arms around the figure, humming a soft Egyptian lullaby with no words. And being cradled gently between their warm bodies were the white petals of a lotus flower.

"Aibou, you aren't as alone as you think."

The room was blurring away. Yuugi was suddenly so tired…so calm…so…

Awake.

The morning light poured through a crack in the curtain. His alarm clock was blaring, telling him another day of school lay ahead. Another day of friends, the game shop, and defending his Game King title.

Throwing back the covers, he stood and gave a lengthy stretch.

It took him a moment to realize what was in his hand. It glinted in the sunlight with dew from fresh tears. It was warm from being so close to his body. It was a little flat from being pressed between two people. The blooming bud of a white lotus flower.

Yuugi gapped at it like a flame without oxygen.

That so _wasn't_ a dream.

"Yuugi, hurry up! We're going to be late!"

"Coming, Anzu!" How long had his alarm been going off? And how long was he staring at that flower? Good thing he had fallen asleep in his uniform. All he had to do was throw on his jacket and grab his backpack before dashing down the stairs. He tucked the lotus blossom next to the Ancient Egyptian box that had been keeping his deck safe for the last two years.

Anzu smiled. "Ready, Yuugi?"

Yuugi returned the smile warmly. "Yes! Let's get going. Bye, Grandpa!"

And as they set off, they met up with Honda and Jonouchi along the way. And as they all walked, smiling and laughing with the sun warm on their backs, Yuugi picked up the light scent of lotus blossoms and the soft River Nile on the wind. And he smiled, wondering why he ever thought he was so alone.

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"_Men do change, and change comes like a little wind that ruffles the curtains at dawn, and it comes like the stealthy perfume of wildflowers hidden in the grass.__"  
--__John Steinbeck_

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A/N: There you have it, folks! A ficlet of happiness. In a little different style than my last one. Some of it was really fact (Egyptians did take dreams very seriously as signs from the Gods or the dead) and real beliefs (Guardian Angel, anyone? I'd love to have Atemu as mine) and the rest was pure Akina. Hope you enjoyed!

By the way, reviews? They are so cool!

Yuugi: You should review because I got Atemu back!

Atemu: You should review because Akina actually updated!

Akina: Hey! I work hard! This is my gift to all of you!

Bakura: Why wasn't I here haunting the dreams of these numbskulls and making their lives a living nightmare? Keh heh heh…

Akina: Do I have to answer that? This isn't your story, Bakura. Beat it.

Bakura: grumble

Akina: Anyway, tell friends! Tell neighbors! Tell you pet goldfish and favorite teddy bear to come review! And then make sure you review, too!


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